Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Woche 4!! Woah I have only one full week left. (8/21/13)

Hallo Family! und Freunden!

So I am really scatter brain today and had the hardest time trying to think of what i even did this week so please bear with me. Mama thank you sooo much for sending me my first package!! It was glorious! and super duper yummy. and all the schwesters and schwester fest loved it. I am all caught up on letter writing so any of you waiting on a letter from me know that it is in the mail.. that being said. It was a little light on the letters this week.... it was very sad.. and hard.. and when i saw others faces light up with delight as they ripped open their lovely letters from their family and friends who love them it was hard not to shed a tear upon my empty letter-free desk. If you are feeling pains of guilt or shame. good you should be. and know that they are there for a reason. 1 Nephi 16:2. ;)

Some funny thoughts really quick. I have a problem. With pens. Everyday I somehow manage to write all over myself. on my shirts and skirts my scalp and my hands are practically black with pen marks. I know that is such a "Sis. Missionary Problem" Other things we say are like "guys I cant decide what to wear gray or black". or "Mench(man) It is so hard to put on pants." haha and then there are times like last night when I leaned over the bed to tell Sis. Lyons my ah-ha moment of writing an email home is the same prossess of planing a lesson. She says something like, "You know what I just thought of... Theses springs on the bottom of your bed look like cow utters." Yeah Ich liebe Sis. Lyons meine Miterbiterin.

So here is a thought for you to chew on. Today marks my 4 weeks. yeah that's a whole month. I have the rest of this week then only one full day after that and then i leave... I get my flight plans I think on Friday so hopefully I am able to tell you guys the  plans so you are by your phones on the day I fly out. please tell me who I should call. and seeing as i only have dads and my number memorized perhaps a phone number of someone elses if that's what you want. 

That all being said we have finished all the grammar lessons that they had planned on teaching us. We are in the review stages of learning the language and I just want them to review it ALL. but when I think about it a little more I really have no worries about learning the language and understanding. I am not just being Polly I know it is hard. believe me I am very aware of the fact that I will not know what they are saying and i will most likely have to relearn everything that they taught me here in the field. But when I allow myself to, I know that the Spirit and God will make sure that I succeed. Its kommish to explain. but If i think about it for a  long time than I have doubts but if I think about it for a long time I have faith. although the other day we had like a 10 min laugh session with Br. Luna over how awkward the first 5 mins of every lesson is. mostly because we don't know how to talk like humans. We knock on the door, "Wie giehts es Ihnen?" (how are you doing) "Gut! (good, because that is quite literally the only response I know how to say.) then we sit down..... lots of awkward silence and a few hundred desperate looks to our companions for help on what to say. and all that comes out is "Wie giehts?" He looks at us like really? you mean to ask me how am I doing since what the 2 seconds you asked me when you walked in? "ja ich bin gut." AWKWARD but all is good haha it gives us great laughing moments.

Our investigators have been really getting it. We had a lesson with Karl and you could feel that he was really wanting a change in his life. that he was really starting to get it and he was craving after the words. but we were hesitant and didn't ask him to set a goal of baptism to act on his faith. but at the next lesson we wanted to focus really hard on what we should do after we have that desire to know and to follow Christ. So after talking for a while we asked him and he said yes, when he knew of the truth for himself then he would act. Its was so amazing. it was a "auch so' (ah-ha moment) Missionaries have this image of forcing baptism on others, but that's not it at all. We never force. in fact if anything we are to hesitant. People have their choice and we understand that but they Want the peace and  comfort and the happiness that the gospel offers. It is a conscious choice we all make every day when we wake up and begin making choices. yeah I took back my thoughts of Karl being a difficult investigator, we were just bad teachers and while we listened to the spirit's promptings we weren't acting on them and once we did that, so did Karl. Sept 20 is the goal he set for himself.

I have been having a reoccurring brain train for the past little bit. And I want to share it so hopefully I can make sense. The theme of it has been understanding the grandeur of God. We all have this most perfect prepared detailed life plan for us. God understands us because He has literally walked His own life and knows how it feels. He has had the experience we have had. I loved how dad put it in his letter to me. "well let me just say that its been hard to say good bye to the two of you in such rapid succession. we really hadnt had the time to even grasp saying good bye to you when before we knew it we were saying goodbye to Chachi.  I have this mental image in my head of standing outside of the TSA security check point and watching you get smaller and smaller.  we stayed and watched while they 'patted you down' or whatever they did and i held your mother trying to be brave for her.  the law of consecration involved in a mission is not just for the missionary.  i truly  cannot understand how Father in Heaven endures holding his beloved Mother in heaven as she sends Her precious little ones off to be tested and tried.  He is braver than me to do it for each and every one of us knowing that so many will be hurt, tried and tested and ultimately found wanting at the judgement day.  i think that is one of the reasons that missionary work is SO vital.  you  and the closest of your 70,000 friends are out there trying to save some of Her precious little ones and because He loves Her so much He blesses all of you whenever He can to be successful.  And of course it is more than a mental image that is floating around the old noggin', it is a memory.  I was there and it was hard to say good-bye to you." 
Now think about that... how amazing is it that our feelings are not arbitrary felt but that there is exact knowledge of how what we feel. 

Next go watch the Mormon message on the current bush so my next thought makes sense. have you ever stared at an artist when they first start to draw. and as they begin you first have no idea what they are drawing but then as they continue you can see the image in your minds eye, and as they keep drawing you think to yourself they have to be almost down look how beautiful, but they just keep going and create something far far better than what you had ever thought about before. God does that with us. most of the time in our lives we cant even see what our goal is what the image is and once we do than we are constantly thinking we can see the finish the details. but when we LET god keep molding us he can make us some thing far beyond what we even know about. 

I have more thoughts that i will have to hand write and have put on the blog but I was out of time a few minutes ago. I love you my family. I pray for you and truly have a deep wish that you can always feel the spirit in you lives. 

until next time 

Sister Wadsworth 

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Week 3 (08/14/13)

Hi y'all!!

Wow! Do you want to hear something crazy!?! I have passed my halfway point in the mtc. I am 1/26th of the way done with my mission already. (I am not counting down, the others sisters just did the math for me).  It has been such a good week! Hard as always but quite wonderful.  I am really getting use to the life here. And I am starting to really thrive off the intensity that it requires you to give. I want to talk mostly about what happened yesterday because it was soo fantastic. 

So we have finally had a good lesson with Karl (our fake investigator) It was really nice to walk out of the lesson knowing that I was teaching to his needs. I still feel really inadequate in the language so it can be frustrating to know that you aren't explaining things clearly or that you are saying the same things over and over again because you simply dont know how else to say things. But the last lesson with Karl and the last to with Xiao Hui have been sooo great and I have no doubt that it is because we have had the spirit with us.

anyway we had a weird schedule yesterday and did this teacher workshop that had us speaking with a teacher, one who taught a different language and go over what we needed help with so that at the end we as the missionaries could give them the pros and cons to their teaching styles. Sis Teilend(?) was my mentor and she was wonderful. We talked about where we were with Karl and Xiao and then we turned to the scriptures. 2Nephi 31: 3
For my soul delighteth in aplainness; for after this manner doth the Lord God work among the children of men. For the Lord God giveth light unto the bunderstanding; for he speaketh unto men according to their clanguage, unto their understanding.

She than asked me what i thought that "God giveth light unto the bunderstanding" meant. I thought about it and said that we learn that truth is light. so when we speak so plainly that there will be gaps in what a person understands that God will fill in the blanks that we cannot speak, or dont understand untill we do "Understand" It was so amazing to sit there with her and to have that talk with her Auf English of course. She than helped me improve my teaching after i had practiced teaching to "Karly" She said that she could feel the spirit I had and that I was living this scripture because with the spirit she understood what I was trying to get across. She did say that I need to ask direct questions. That I was going in a round about way to ask her how to follow Christ. 

As I thought more about that it really hit me hard that I had this weakness in my armor, a chink. And that it was that I needed to more fully trust in my faith that I had in God. That I knew the promises He gives His children are real, but that I needed to have more confidence in Him to extend those promises to others. I really was grateful to be humbled in this way. Because it did show me where i was lacking and how i could improve and not have those problems with Karl and Xiou. 

and then later that night we had tuesday devotional. All my time going to Devotionals at BYUI and for the like 20th speaker here at the MTC I have never seen an apostle or one of the members of the first Presidency speak in person. And I would tell Sis. Lyons that we have to get there early just encase there was someone "big" coming. and nothing happened. Well for this week we were recruited to sing in the choir because they needed more sisters. I was soo happy. (only lately as in the past 3 days I have been finally catching the sickness that everyone in my zone has had... it is not a pretty sight, so please pray for my health) I was happy although I am not too sure how well I sang. 

Anyway we get there and have a great practice, seriously all those who come to the MTC need to go to choir, its not like church choir its great! and after everything settles down and we are about to start. Everyone stands up and inwalks the MTC presidency. and ELDER RICHARD G. SCOTT!! only like my very favorite apostle!! I was soo excited. and could feel yet another tender mercy from God to me showing me that He loves me. 

There were many things that he talked about. but he focused on the "supernal gift, and sacred privilege we have to communicate to our Heavenly Father" Some of the truths that he reminded us of is that, We have a Heavenly Father, who loves us, who knows us, and wants the very best for us. If we could only constantly live by that understanding than how much better off would our lives be.

He gave 3 ways that our prayers are answered. 1 we will feel a peace of confirmation 2. we will feel a stupper of thought that is guiding us away from that choice. and 3. we wont get an answer. that in those moments god is putting his trust in us that we can choose for ourselves. 
"sometimes God lets you struggle for a long time" but the longer the time the greater you faith, the stronger you character. Know that you should pray even when you have NO desire to pray. Never fear you are too unworthy to pray. do not fear repentance. repentance is hope and Heavenly Father will propt us what steps to take next. 

" God has called us on this mission to earth not to fail but to succeed gloriously. He wants us to grow. He will not abandon us. He knows the potential that we can become. He wants to show you your capacity and the give you blessings and talents that you have yet to discover. 

He than left an apostalic blessing on us who are learning a language that "We will Succeed with the Help of the Lord"

best day ever!!


I love this gospel and the comfort and peace and happiness that I feel when I obey the standards and commandments it teaches. I know that I am a Daughter of God who loves me because I feel it a hundred time each day. I love you all and miss you dearly. I really do. Please dont forget me..

Love your daughter and friend,
Sis. Wadsworth

Massive amounts of books
Sunday is my all time favorite day of the week.
And guess who I saw! Sister Carrie Damstadt!

These are the massive amounts of books I have acquired since being here at the MTC
A beautiful Sunset they make me sehr glucklich
For Tuesday devotional walking back there really is like a crazy amount of missionaries. It's so cool to think about. There are just so many! 
haha no one can deny we aren't like the Army of Heleman.
Really hard to see but that is a picture of Elder Scott.
One of my favorite sights is Tues devos with all the missionaries in suits and skirts
Me and Sister Carrie Damstandt
Sunday
Me and Sister Carrie Damstandt
My schedule while here at the MTC
My Schedule while here at the MTC
Typical day in class.
All the German Sisters enjoying our Schwester Fest
All the German Sisters enjoying our Schwester Fest

Me eating a banana. Sister Lyons has band me from ever getting them at the cafeteria because I always end up giving them away. But here I am proving her wrong, mostly because no on else wanted it. ;)









Woche Zwei‏ (Week 2 08/07/13)

This is week 2!! Its weird to see all the dork dotted missionaries coming in and thinking that that was us only 14 days ago.
 
So this week will be a little bit different. I have written you the most hearty letter ever! and a ton of individual letters. so expect those in the next 2-4 days. It was so good to see the wedding turn out so sooo beautifully! and to receive all of your post cards. Seriously getting mail from you guys is like manna from heaven. I know its hard to realize from the "at home" perspective but it feels like each day is a week so hearing from you guys often so encouraging. I am understanding the language a lot better now. It is taught at an incredibly fast pace. You really have to use like every second of your study time. I really have explained at great detail all of this. so just trust me. emailing photos takes for ever so I think I am going to spend most of my time on my p-days to send photos. and explain them a touch. and just snail mail you my letter. I hope you are all having a wonderful time traveling all about. It really brings me much happiness and relief hearing that it has all gone so smoothly for the most part. I love you all and miss you lots! One more note. I only have time to write letters on Wednesday and Sunday. so when it takes me a while to write that is why. and it take like 3 days of mail time.
 
 
 
Thanks so much family I love you!!


BEFORE our lesson the friday after we came

BEFORE our lesson the Friday after we came

AFTER our lesson

My District

This is district. There is Elder Brown and Elder Strong. Me and Sister Lyons. Elder Ellis and Elder Weigel
The Elders in my District
In front of "Deutschland" as Bruder Luna calls our classroom

Sister Lyons in front of "Deutschland"

Sister Lyons and I

Elders Weigel and Ellis

It is so cold in our room that I have to lay out all my books on the vents

My Roomies and our awesome host sisters who gave us a ton of help those first few days

Temple walk on Sunday is my favorite!

Me with all the Frankfurt Girls

Sister Lyons

My beautiful District

My beautiful district

P-day was much needed that first Wednesday

We did laundry, made our beds, and cleaned our room



Us studying outside in the glorious sun

Us being extremely goofy


The Temple is so relazing and wonderful!

The three laying down are ?, Blackhurst, and Young


Me and my awesome shirts

Spencer: you can forward these on to my peeps

Elder Mace being jelly of Sister Lyons


Sister Lyons is seriously the best!! she always is upbeat and so spiritual. she has a beautiful voice and has the talent of knowing how to sincerely give compliments  She is also a GREAT listener. I have a many of times pulled a dad and talked her ear off but she very kindly listened to my life story. I have been truly blessed by knowing her, and a better missionary for having her as meine miterbeiterin.
 



Week 1 COMPLETE! (07/31/13)

Hello Mein Familie!
 
WOW! life has been so crazy these past few days. I can add to the ol' MTC saying of days feel like weeks and the weeks feel like days. It is serh weird. So I will start from the beginning. sorry before hand for the random jumpings in topics and the horrible spelling, grammer, and punctuation. (it's because of the short time... no better its because i already think in german)
 
When I went through security to board the plane I was "that one". I had to have my stuff go through the scanner 3 times!! They of course didn't find anything wrong. but it did cause my nerves to jump up a few notches. Boarding the plane went very smoothly so did the flight. It was much too short considering I had only had like 2 hours of sleep the night before. I found wendy quickly and right away she warned me of my luggage size and how hard that would be to tote around in Europe. So I became very aware of that fact... We went to the temple no problem. We met up with Jason in the chapel and had plenty of time to wait before our session started. It was wonderful being able to see family and talk with them. It helped calm my nerves. I know the temple had a big part to play in my calmness as well. I really enjoyed the live session. I loved how interactive it was.
 
We went to home and later to the much needed bed.  I continued to talk to uncle meic and aunt wendy about all things german. I tried sparkling water.... it was interesting. i hope i can get use to it because that is aparently all they drink there. we went to breakfast then over to uncle James. after the lovely visit with uncle James, we toured aunt Roxs grand house as I am sure you have all now had the pleasure of staying in. Then we headed off to Provo.
 
When i first arrived another sister helped me with my bags and I got my beautiful name tag and other info. we dropped off my stuff at apperarently the nicest living quarters for sisters that there is. SCORE. then went to orentation after orentation. It was still very hard for me to stay awake. really for like the next 4 days it was hard for me to not doze off in the meetings or personal study time in the morning. or even during class. (Sorry Burder Luna) The schedule here is very intense but we still have a lot of free time at the same time. it is weird. this whole place is full of oxymorons. I will send a seperate email with all the photos and captions. i have to go to a different building to do that.
 
My companion Sister Lyons ist sehr wundebar. I am the "hard" companion. Its weird being with someone all the time. I wont lie it is hard. I have little victories in the day like when we search  for a bathroom and we only find one that has one stall so i can go with out another set of ears. that equals victory. The food here is hit and miss. I am impressed that they can have decent food for so many missionaries. but at the same time some meals are just straight up gross. I got so over whelmed with all the choices the first couple days that i forgot about all my comfort foods. like milk. yeah life got a ton better after i started having a glass of milk every meal.
 
So the first day we went to class we met our Lehren Bruder Luna. The man is AMAZING!! for many reasons which will make sense later. He spoke straight German to us for the whole class. then again the next day and the next. It is interesting because while i know I shouldnt have that much knowledge about the german language I can for the most part understand him if i am focused. But there was this one time where we were doing a q&a exercise standing in a circle. He randomly asked me the question and I just stared blankly not at him or anything but just brain fried. till doh i realized he was waiting for a response. "bitte" he laughed the whole class laughed and he said hi hello welcome back to class in german of course. garsh that wasnt embarressing at all. the first days were so so overwhelming. they are filled with I cant do this, I dont know what to do or where to go. but once you experience sunday life is good again.
 

-Sister Wadsworth


Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Farewell Talk

Hello Brothers and sisters! 

I was talking to Bro. Mitchell about what my talk was on for today and the conversation went a little like this. Hey Bro. Mitchell so what is my topic for Sunday. Well the assigned topic is Elaine S. Daltons past General Conference address, “We are Daughters of our Heavenly Father,” oh and since its near pioneer day bring in pioneers to your talk too. Oh and relate it to your mission….. So today I will be speaking on the gospel. All of it.
            As I was pondering on the subject, a very strong connection between the three became apparent to me. They all were examples of foundations of faith.
            I once had a great seminary teacher who shared a personal story with his class. He was telling us about his trip to Jerusalem and how on one of the days the tour guide took the group to the top of a hill that overlooked the city in the valley. And said something along the lines of, “it is important to get as high as you can and as often as you can because it helps you understand what goes on in the valley and how you can better get around.” I love this. It is so very important that we are able to keep an eternal perspective when living our lives on earth. It is easier to follow the faith that we have when we can see it in the big picture. It is also so very important to trust those who continually have that higher view and understanding. It is this faith in God that Sis. Dalton described in her address.

QUOTE: “Every week young women all over the world repeat the Young Women theme. No matter the language, each time I hear these words, “We are daughters of our Heavenly Father, who loves us, and we love Him,”1 the Spirit affirms to my soul that they are true. It is not only an affirmation of our identity—who we are—but also an acknowledgment of whose we are. We are daughters of an exalted being!
          “What-e’er thou art, act well thy part.” That simple statement renewed my vision that Heavenly Father knew me and had a plan for my life, and the spirit I felt helped me understand that my part mattered.”

Sister Dalton was teaching us a valuable lesson in how we can build and lean on our foundations of faith. When we understand that we are sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father, we learn that our part to play, or what we think and how we act should reflect this divine knowledge of our supreme heritage.

            One  of the song the primary children are learning pops into my head, “if the savior stood beside me” The first verse goes like this.
 1. If the Savior stood beside me,
would I do the things I do?
Would I think of His commandments,
and try harder to be true?
Would I follow His example?
Would I live more righteously
if I could see the Savior standing nigh,
watching over me?

 What a powerful message! Brothers and Sisters, Please remember always that your father who resides in Heaven is a God. That you have been promised if you live your lives righteously you shall inherit thrones, kingdoms, principalities, and powers, dominions, all heights and depths. Having this knowledge sets the base of our foundation and if understood will be an unwavering source of strength.

The Early saint of this church understood their role in this life and acted on the simple faith that they had to do all that they could to stay true to their testimonies.
In the first Presidency message in July’s Ensign, President Thomas S. Monson wrote,

 “For many, the pioneer trek of 1847 didn’t begin at Nauvoo, Kirtland, Far West, or New York but rather in distant England, Scotland, Scandinavia, or Germany.

Between the safety of home and the promise of Zion stood the angry and treacherous waters of the mighty Atlantic. Who can recount the fear that gripped the human heart during those perilous crossings? Prompted by the silent whisperings of the Spirit, sustained by a simple yet abiding faith, those pioneer Saints trusted in God and set sail on their journey.
They finally reached Nauvoo only to set out again to face hardships on the trail. Tombstones of sage and rock marked graves the entire route from Nauvoo to Salt Lake City. Such was the price some pioneers paid. Their bodies are buried in peace, but their names live on evermore.
The passage of time dims our memories and diminishes our appreciation for those who walked the path of pain, leaving behind a tear-marked trail of nameless graves.

It is remarkable to me the integrity [they] demonstrated toward the faith [they did] have and the truth [they] already knew even though most were only recent converts.

I quote again from President Monson, “But what of today’s challenges? Are there no rocky roads to travel, no rugged mountains to climb, no chasms to cross, no trails to blaze, no rivers to ford? Or is there a very present need for that pioneer spirit to guide us away from the dangers that threaten to engulf us and to lead us to a Zion of safety?”

I can testify of the importance of having a foundation of faith. In the past few weeks a lot of thoughts have ran through my head. On one particular day I was struck with fear. Fear of failing to measure up to what lay before me. Was I really ready for this? What if because I choose to lack in my gospel studies I am unable to teach one of my fellow brothers or sisters in the way that they deserve? Why was I even going on a mission? Was it because I had felt an affirmation when I asked or was I just following the mission crazy? I stopped myself. I knelt down and opened my heart to God. I asked him these questions. I asked him to answer these questions that I should have been able to answer myself. As I arose from the ground I was heard Elder Holland’s words “in moments of fear or doubt or troubling times, hold the ground you have already won, even if that ground is limited.” So I began listing all the things I knew. I leaned on my foundation of faith that I have built. I know that I have a Heavenly Father who listens to me, who is always there for me, even when I might not always listen to Him and might not always be there for Him. He is there. I know with surety that I have a Savior. Jesus Christ has stood as advocate for me. He has opened the gates to my forgiveness. I love Him. I treasure Him. I Believe in Him. I know that prayer is real. I know that I have received answers to my questions and concerns. I have, through Prayer received a testimony of the truthfulness of the Book of Mormon, and of this Church. I know that in October I received a sure answer to my prayer when I asked God what direction to take my life, and He responded to go and lend a hand in proclaiming this truth that I know to others. I know that there is a hope in this gospel. A light that cannot be dimmed by the pessimists of the world.  “ Wherefore, whoso believeth in God might with surety hope for a better world, yea, even a place at the right hand of God, whichhope cometh of faith, maketh an anchor to the souls of men, which would make them sure and steadfast, always abounding in good works, being led to glorify God.”
I know that I have been prepared for this life by a wonderful wonderful family. With parents so very kind and dear. I love this gospel and feel humbled to have been trusted with the responsibility to take it to the world.

Let us all press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men., feasting upon the word of Christ, and enduring to the end